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kenny

Slight Dilema

Hey Guys,

Well Im 14 and I have a girlfriend who is 17 (yeah how lucky am I :p)

We have been going out for 2 years and she has recently asked me for sex. She and me have talked to her parents (I Go around their for dinner many times, she has very nice parents) and they say its fine, her mum bought her the pill, a couple of condoms and a dildo (Creepy). Her dad says its her choice when shes older than 16 and he likes me so I think he doesnt have a problem.

Its just im a bit nervous, i am sleeping round her place in a couple of weeks and dont know how to have sex, i mean I know the act if you would like to call it but how do you sorta have sex? like lying down slowly or fast or something, im really nervous that im gonna screw it up, I Understand the law but I think that was mainly for girls getting pregnant to be honest.

What do you guys think?
Yoshi

Dude! Her MUM Bought Her A Dildo? Jesus Christ! My Advice, Run Away From That Family!
Fizzy

One thing, you're under the age of 16 and she's over the age of 16 - she's breaking the law by having sex with you.

Second thing, you shouldn't really plan sex, you should just let it happen naturally. If you know when it's going to happen you will get more and more nervous about it. Your nerves suggest that you're kind of not ready anyway.

Third thing, if you've been with her for two years you should be able to talk to her about your worries.

Stay safe  
Twitchamoo

i don't believe her mom bought her a dildo.
Fizzy

That is rather bizarre.

My mum has bought me a pack of condoms before, the day before I went away on holiday for the first time with my boyfriend (even though we'd been sleeping together for 6 months previously lol). I think that's all a mother should be buying her daughter though, nothing else!
Reaper

Well, have you asked your parents? It's against the law, what you do if your dad was 28? He'd have been your age no when you were born.

Just don't do it, UNLESS, you have absoloutly 100% confidence.
Watch Porn videos, they usually have that sick stuff.
kenny

Porn vids are for "Hardcore banging" to be precise, for me thats not what sex is about. sex is about love not spunking everywhere for the camera :/
Fizzy

I think if you're genuinely ready and think it's 100% ok, you wouldn't be asking anybody  
Reaper

Bugger, that sounded like I watched porn, I don't, I don't think it's needed, so I love your analogy xD.
Peew4K

Yeah, dude I wouldn't I feel extremely nervous about that stuff, but then again your 14 she's 17, you should have sex, she'll understand. my comment was totally wierd, I change my mind, have sex, seriously don't worry about it, her mum and dad are comfortable, so is she, you should be comfortable, if she is a virgin then yes have sex, you both won't be good at it so here's your chance... sounded strange.
Fizzy

Has nobody else apart from me latched onto the thought that she is committing an offence by being involved with him sexually? If it was a 17 year old guy going out with a 14 year old girl then people would think it was slightly wrong.
KCLiVeS

Fizzy wrote:
Has nobody else apart from me latched onto the thought that she is committing an offence by being involved with him sexually? If it was a 17 year old guy going out with a 14 year old girl then people would think it was slightly wrong.


I agree entirely with that. However I think because the minor is a boy it seems less "sick" for want of a better phrase.

If I knew one of my friends had had sex with a 14 year old I would be quite disturbed to tell you the truth. So maybe you should talk to her about it first?
ferret47

Fizzy wrote:
Has nobody else apart from me latched onto the thought that she is committing an offence by being involved with him sexually? If it was a 17 year old guy going out with a 14 year old girl then people would think it was slightly wrong.


I thought it was only the girl that needed to be over 16 legally and the boy could be any age. I don't mind about the legal issue but if you don't feel ready then don't do it there will be plenty of opportunities later and i'm sure she'll understand. Talk to her about it and see how she feels as you may want the relationship to proceed before anything like that.
KCLiVeS

ferret47 wrote:
Fizzy wrote:
Has nobody else apart from me latched onto the thought that she is committing an offence by being involved with him sexually? If it was a 17 year old guy going out with a 14 year old girl then people would think it was slightly wrong.


I thought it was only the girl that needed to be over 16 legally and the boy could be any age. I don't mind about the legal issue but if you don't feel ready then don't do it there will be plenty of opportunities later and i'm sure she'll understand. Talk to her about it and see how she feels as you may want the relationship to proceed before anything like that.


It is 16 for males and females.

http://www.ruthinking.co.uk/about..._and_the_law/sexual_offences.aspx

However that site is wrong as it is 18 males for gay sex, however interestingly there is no age of consent for lesbian sex.
ferret47

KCLiVES wrote:
ferret47 wrote:
Fizzy wrote:
Has nobody else apart from me latched onto the thought that she is committing an offence by being involved with him sexually? If it was a 17 year old guy going out with a 14 year old girl then people would think it was slightly wrong.


I thought it was only the girl that needed to be over 16 legally and the boy could be any age. I don't mind about the legal issue but if you don't feel ready then don't do it there will be plenty of opportunities later and i'm sure she'll understand. Talk to her about it and see how she feels as you may want the relationship to proceed before anything like that.


It is 16 for males and females.

http://www.ruthinking.co.uk/about..._and_the_law/sexual_offences.aspx

However that site is wrong as it is 18 males for gay sex, however interestingly there is no age of consent for lesbian sex.


Gay covers both (A person whose sexual orientation is to persons of the same sex.)
Peew4K

Stop talkin about gay sex!!! it's totally away from what we are talkin about, look dude the only advice I can give is be confident, don't act nervous, also don't forget to wear a condom, maybe you could talk to her before this anyway, she probably hasn't done it herself anyway, you've been together for 2 years right? you'll pull through dude!
KCLiVeS

ferret47 wrote:
KCLiVES wrote:
ferret47 wrote:
Fizzy wrote:
Has nobody else apart from me latched onto the thought that she is committing an offence by being involved with him sexually? If it was a 17 year old guy going out with a 14 year old girl then people would think it was slightly wrong.


I thought it was only the girl that needed to be over 16 legally and the boy could be any age. I don't mind about the legal issue but if you don't feel ready then don't do it there will be plenty of opportunities later and i'm sure she'll understand. Talk to her about it and see how she feels as you may want the relationship to proceed before anything like that.


It is 16 for males and females.

http://www.ruthinking.co.uk/about..._and_the_law/sexual_offences.aspx

However that site is wrong as it is 18 males for gay sex, however interestingly there is no age of consent for lesbian sex.


Gay covers both (A person whose sexual orientation is to persons of the same sex.)


I know that, however I was using gay to describe homosexual male sex, not female. What I said is still true.
Fizzy

Yep what KCLiVES said about the law is right ^^^
KCLiVeS

Fizzy wrote:
Yep what KCLiVES said about the law is right ^^^


Thanks
Don't you think its strange?
Peew4K

I don't like gay sex...
Fizzy

Paulolad wrote:
I don't like gay sex...


Same as straight sex - it's just something two people do when they're in love. Plus a lot of straight couples do together what gay couples do together anyway.

And yeah KCLiVES I don't get it either.
KCLiVeS

Fizzy wrote:
Paulolad wrote:
I don't like gay sex...


Same as straight sex - it's just something two people do when they're in love. Plus a lot of straight couples do together what gay couples do together anyway.

And yeah KCLiVES I don't get it either.


Paulolad, keep your views to yourself.

And Fizzy, I think it's because male society is more accepting (maybe even welcomes to a certain extent) lesbian relationships as compared with gay ones which were once illegal.
Reaper

Straight males find lesbians hot, that's the thing.
I'm always called gay, because I act "camp".
Fizzy

Ancodi wrote:
Straight males find lesbians hot, that's the thing.
I'm always called gay, because I act "camp".


I'm sure there are lots of women out there though that find gay men hot too lol...

Yeah it's annoying that people bully people at school because of being camp  

Anyway we're going off topic!
KCLiVeS

Ancodi wrote:
Straight males find lesbians hot, that's the thing.
I'm always called gay, because I act "camp".


My friend used to get that, but hes blatantly straight...
Kitty

My advise for you is yo make sure you are 100% confident and ready. If you are not ready, then your girlfriend should respect your descision and wait. It's really up to you.
Like Fizzy said, she, being 17 and you 14- it could be trialed as rape

Going off topic...
I know I'm being stereotypical, but I'd love to have an openly gay friend! You can feel comfortable being around them and go shopping and stuff!
Fizzy

Like a Gok Wan kinda guy? He's so cool.
Kitty

Yeah! He is ace! Awww, get younger Gok!
Fizzy

I don't think there are many guys that are gay and open about it that are younger than about 18. Unfortunately society still isn't very accepting and the bullying at school can be so bad.
Reaper

Kitty wrote:
My advise for you is yo make sure you are 100% confident and ready. If you are not ready, then your girlfriend should respect your descision and wait. It's really up to you.
Like Fizzy said, she, being 17 and you 14- it could be trialed as rape

Going off topic...
I know I'm being stereotypical, but I'd love to have an openly gay friend! You can feel comfortable being around them and go shopping and stuff!


Not rape, technically it's just sex, while illegal. If Your girlfriend/boyfriend over 18, then it's child molestation.

[offtopic]
I have 4 openly gay friends, it's not all that it's cracked up to be.
[/offtopic]
Fizzy

There's no big deal about gay people being open about their sexuality really. A lot of people make a big deal about it, and there are pride festivals and stuff, and I sometimes think it gets a bit crazy and unnecessary.
Peew4K

This guy hasn't replied to this thread, I don't think he's bothered now...
Brad

what ear you in because if ure an old 14 and ure mature person doesnt sound to bad but if your young then illd say no

but dont do it if ure not ready main point
humandalek91

I don't think you should. Your 14! The law is 16, and 16 for a reason. At least when you become 16 you will possibly be more ready. I think the mother and the dildo thing is all wrong. So kenny what happened.
Chrissie

Please do not bump topics older than 15 days.
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