Blahh Parents affair??

Well Known Member

Im asking this on behalf of someone else. Whos forgot their password

What do you do when you find out one of your parents is having an affair/slept with someone else. Timeline so sum up whats actually happened.....
1. Mum gets a text, Child reads text.
2. Other messages in inbox straight away show mum is having an affair and has slept with this person.
3. Child is shocked and sad, doesnt know what to do.
4. Child tells some friends for support. Friends aka me, give c*** advice and are no help. (The advice was "If you don't want to split your family up keep quiet, and whatever you do DONT tell your young brother)
5. Child does not want to split up the fam.

What does Child do?!
Oh and Child knows the man on the other end of the affair.
Child also says, help me.

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Elite Member

Perhaps the child misunderstood?

are they 100% sure that she is having an affair...?

Getting Started

omg

seriously the chil shoul keep quiet.

People have affairs al the time

Well Known Member

Rofl she actually isn't a child i just wrote that...16 year old.

Yeh shes 100% sure sure.

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Sub-Zero Member

mypassdontwork wrote:

People have affairs al the time

Unfortunately that's true these days

People don't seem to value relationships anymore, and more and more marriages are ending.

Anyway, this is a really tricky situation for your friend. By the sound of it mum isn't being very careful about people finding out about her affair - this could be taken two ways. Either it's completely innocent and there isn't an affair going on at all - maybe her and this other person make dirty jokes and stuff all the time and that's just how they are together? Either that, or there is indeed an affair going on and she isn't bothered about people finding out. Maybe she thinks it would be easier for her husband to find out himself than for her to have to tell him.

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Enthusiastic Member

child should confront mum when dad aint around.

hope it helped

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Well Known Member

Ok, She says thanks for your answers and she'll elaborate a little more because she still wants more advice

...her mum normally hides the phone and never let's anyone touch it. So she doesn't think she/or her dad was ment to find it. Because when the text came through - the phone was actually hidden in a drawer, but she heard the text tone and got it out.

...the texts weren't jokey texts, if you read them, you'd know something was up.

...the texts also said about them being together on Thursday, however her mum told her she was working because he was off work and she needed to cover him (they're co-workers, plus my friend worked with him over the summer holidays) So she lied about where she/he was.

I feel helpless

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ÜberGod

Erm............

Thats a very tough decision

To be honest i would probably keep quite as the affair will probably be over soon.On the other hand,maybe it would be good to confront the parent that is cheating and just say"I know whats happening with you and another person,i dont want to tell your boyfriend/girlfriend as i dont want you to break up".

Its a hard choice

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:O

Sub-Zero Member

It's probably best to do nothing, and wait until mum comes to her senses or the fling ends naturally as flings usually do. If you confront her, you risk losing her trust in you - for a start from her point of view you shouldn't have looked at her phone even though you were suspicious about things.

Don't tell anybody else in your family about it because the risk of the secret being leaked is too high and it would be more upsetting for your dad to find out from someone other than your mum herself.

If you find it hard to keep a secret this big to yourself, there's always the Samaritans charity who provide "confidential non-judgemental emotional support, 24 hours a day for people who are experiencing feelings of distress or despair".

http://www.samaritans.org/

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Enthusiastic Member

she has done wrong and obviously she wasn't that careful about someone finding it.

Ok yes she might lose trust with her mum but the child should give her an ultimatum. Either end the affair or she will tell dad. I know it sounds a bit melodramatic but that is the way it is.

Good luck.

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SSL Celebrity

child should shut up and hide away forever...

Well Known Member

Rofl. She says thanks.
Blackmail is the answer. kiddin' kiddin'

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Sub-Zero Member

I have to say...it sort of isn't any of the childrens business in a way. Obviously they are part of the family unit and your friend is the person who has found out about it, but it is an adult situation and I don't think the children should interfere at all.

I think maybe if you really want to confront her, you should gather more evidence first because if you just say ''I saw this on your phone and this on the computer'' excuses could be made up for it. If you keep your eye on her for a month or two and then tell her what you know, you've got a much higher chance of getting through to her.

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